Emotional Arrested Development

Identifying Emotional Immaturity

I’ve been doing a lot of reading, and I’m not entirely convinced by all the diagnoses that therapists often assign. But as I began reading about the behaviors of emotionally immature adults, I recognized every single sign in myself.

What immediately came to mind was my childhood—how people called me “crazy,” how no one believed me when I tried to speak up about what was happening to me. I can clearly see now how those moments connect to where I am emotionally today.

At times, it feels like I’m stuck at a certain age—an adult who still has tantrums, withdraws, stops talking, doesn’t show up, struggles with responsibility, and leaves jobs. It’s all connected to being unheard and unbelieved for so long. Even now, when I speak, I find myself constantly asking, “Do you know what I mean?”or “Are you listening?” That need to be heard never left me.

I don’t believe medication alone can fix this. Spiritually, I know I must take accountability. I must learn how to manage my emotions and set healthy boundaries—and I must also allow others to set boundaries with me.

My children were never meant to carry my emotional weight or my trauma. I failed them as a mother in helping them process their emotions because I never learned how to manage my own. My mother taught me the Word of God, but she did not teach me how to process emotions. Because that skill was never modeled for me, I never passed it on to my children.

So, Lord, I repent—for placing emotional burdens on my younger brother, on my children, and on my husband. My children took on responsibilities that were meant for only an adult to handle and manage.

I am willing to learn. I am willing to grow. I am willing to confront my emotional trauma and misbehaviors. Teach me, Lord God, self-control. My spending is out of control. My eating is out of control. I take on more than I can handle because I do not understand how to set limits.

I want to worship You and serve You in spirit and in truth. I desire to be a Free woman of God, and I want to help teach others how to walk in freedom.

I have been stuck in a state of Arrested Development but I decree that today is my Day to be Free! I thank you Lord God for giving me the capacity to know and to now understand this issue of blood that I have been battling with. Lord I am that woman at the well on today God! I come to touch the hem of your garment ! Heal me! Father God I stretch my hands out to you as I sign of, “ I Surrender”.

I speak Hosea 4:6,

My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children.

Thank You, Lord, for a family that loves me unconditionally. Thank You for keeping Your hand upon me.

Today, I declare that I am being born again. I come to You with childlike faith. I trust You, Lord, to be my Keeper. My Healer. My Deliverer! You keep those who desire to be kept in perfect peace.